Solitude

I walk in the door after a full day at work.  My husband is in the kitchen working with music playing.  The children are in the lounge.  One is playing on the computer, the others are watching a video.  I sit on the sofa, and the video-watchers clamber over me, squabbling over the space on my lap.

Once the children are fed, cleaned, and herded into bed, my husband and I collapse onto the sofa.  I pick up the laptop to browse the Reader and Facebook.  My husband holds the TV remote control – after the News he flicks through the channels.

I begin to feel restless and fidgety. I long for some space with silence.  I retreat to the bathroom, light a candle, and begin to fill the tub.I soak in the stillness and silence, as much as I soak in the hot water.

I consider the things that help me “recharge”.  Like soaking in a hot bath or going for a long walk.  The common theme I find is the solitude.  I need solitude, yet it’s so hard to find space for that in my day to day life.  I’ve found I need to make an effort to create moments of solitude for myself.

At lunchtime in the office, I choose to take my sandwiches and find a sunny corner in a park to eat them in solitude.

Sometimes I retreat to the library.

When I can I go for a walks.

When I don’t make the space to “recharge my batteries” with solitude, I become crabby and scratchy.  Making time for myself gives me the ability to become a better spouse, parent, employee and friend.

I’m learning the key is not to fill up the solitude with too much doing. I need to create the space to “be”, to open up the real me and letting the real me out.

You are only what you are when no one is looking.

Edwards, Robert C.
Quote from Quotations Book

How do you “recharge”?  And who are you when you’re alone?